Listen.
Yesterday afternoon I went downtown to see "Crazy Heart" at the Pickford Theater. There was a long line. The tiny theater was full. I didn't see anyone I recognized. That's unusual, considering that I've lived in Bellingham since 1974.
I'm not sure how the movie would be experienced by someone who has neither experienced alcoholism first-hand nor loved an alcoholic. I thought that it would be a re-make of "Tender Mercies," starring Robert Duvall, especially because Robert Duvall appeared in "Crazy Heart." It went beyond "Tender Mercies" in a way that I didn't expect but which was deeply affirming of my choices in connection with Richard, the alcoholic I loved who died in April of 2008.
Richard loved movies and was a fan of Jeff Bridges. I can only guess, but my guess is that this is a movie that Richard would have suggested for me to see.
Despite what the song says, Richard didn't ruin my life anymore than the alcoholic man in "Crazy Heart" ruined the life of the young woman who loved him. There is something Ram Dass called "fierce grace." That describes my experience with Richard.
Fierce grace. Mourning. Morning.
"Pick up your crazy heart and give it one more try."
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